something more meaningful

today i have this urge to make something out of my life. this might sound a little dark but i think its gray - i want to know how people will remember me. i want to know what would be written in my obituary.

there was a time in my life where i used to take the extra effort in everything that i did. i used to write letters to my grandparents, write to my friends as well, read books, have dinner on the dining table, talk to my famly members, drop into their houses just to catch up, make hospital visits if someone was ill, spend time with friends who were down, give a shoulder to cry on, know what my family required and provide it to the best of my ability.....

i did stuff and now i just seem to be so stressed out that the meaning of life has disappeared. in those rare occasions when i find myself with people who really mean something to me, i take that extra step. when it comes to family i try to be a good son and then something or the other pisses me off and i step back.

when did it suddenly become about me? when did everything become more a formality rather than a something done straight from the heart and without expectations? when did it get so complicated? when did it become so confusing??

the fact is that its actually easier to do something straight from the heart and with meaning
the fact is that i complicate things in my head by thing over and over and over again about the consequences
the fact is that as long as you are genuine in the way you say or do something nothing can go wrong
the fact is that positivity should just flow through you
the fact is that whatever i have is not my accomplishments but Gods blessings showered on me
the fact is that i have put more faith in me rather than my creator
the fact is that i mean a lot to people around me
the fact is that i as an individual can make a difference
the fact is that the feelings that are making me write these words are deep rooted and pure and i just need to tap into them every day of my life.....they will strengthen me and make me grow into a person that did and said the right things always........thats my goal and my endeavour is to reach for it each day.....