after wishing for it and popping those so called 'chill pills' i seem to have slowed down a bit too much. life seems to be moving in slow motion and i see myself watching it and not reaching out for the remote. its a scary feeling because i feel numb most of the time now.
since the 1st i havnt woken up at 5 in the morning and gone for a walk, i havnt been interested in doing much really. its so cold.
the fact is that i wanted to do a lot more this year. there are some plans which have to have to have to materialise. they have to for my own good, for my own growth.
i need to find the balance and i need to find it now. i love both sides. i want to go through the rest of my life like as if i were riding a bike......
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