She is right, its weird

So todays is Faffsy's birthday. I consider her my best friend. It is her 25th birthday and I really wanted to make it special for her. I don't think I did.

We havnt been talking for the last couple of weeks ha! This must be the millionth time.....but its her birthday! And I just wanted to do something. Last evening I had to decide between buying her an ipod (with display) or a watch. I bought the watch. So my plan was to just give her the gift through someone since we are not talking and all ha again! This morning I decided I
shouldn't, I wanted to wish her like I would 'normally' have done.....so I did....funny how doing that got me an invite for a birthday lunch....stupid how I agreed to go.....just because she would have liked me to be there.....

It was a weird lunch.....I wanted to take a cake.....I wanted to do so much more.....but now I can't because I don't know when I could get over bearing....when I could cross the line.....I paid the lunch bill and that also became weird.....

Guess that's how things are.....

Faffsy, I wish I could have made this day special for you.....I wish we could be like we are when things are normal.......a very Happy Birthday to you mach! Hope the year ahead is the best one ever.....I wish you all that I would wish for myself.....I love you da.....